What Comes After 100%?
by Chezni

 

The End of One Journey is the Beginning of Another

So, I’ve finished cataloging my Steam library. What did I do to celebrate? I stared at a blank computer monitor for about 2 hours and then depressed, went to bed. I knew it would happen. It always does at the end of a big project. After working so long and so hard on something, you inevitably come to the conclusion at the end that it wasn’t the finished product that you were excited about, it was the journey there. It’s interesting to think that I’ve written reviews for over a hundred games at this point… but that’s all. It’s just interesting. Acquiring the knowledge of the game, experiencing them, figuring out how to record those experiences–while it was stressful–that was the fun part. I will never stop playing games, but I am happy to say that even though I have finished my cataloging, I have not yet purchased a new game to play and I probably won’t for quite some time. I think I will enjoy being free for a time and play the Tier 1 games that I have recorded.

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Scanner Sombre
by LepcisMagna

My favorite professors were the ones who assigned papers that “are as long as they need to be to get your point across.”  Or, in the words of Winston Churchill: “A good speech should be like a woman’s skirt; long enough to cover the subject and short enough to create interest.”

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The Town of Light
by LepcisMagna

There are walking simulators and then there are walking simulators.  The Town of Light is an exploration of a mid-century sanitarium.  It might have been an interesting, contemplative experience except for one thing – the thing that can be the downfall of any walking simulator: a slow walking speed.

 

I don’t think I’ve ever gotten out of my chair after playing a video game and thought “Wow!  I walk so fast!  It’s great!”.  Certainly, I do like my DOOM “walking faster than Usain Bolt running” speed, but this is the first time I’ve actually felt like my brain was moving in slow motion because getting from point A to point B was so

 

 

painfully,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

tediously,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

laboriously,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ponderously,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

excrutiatingly

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

slow!

 

Beyond that, there are even times that the limited control a walking simulator is taken away – you can’t actually turn around, you can’t even look away from the 20 degrees in front of you – which makes me wonder why it wasn’t just a cutscene.  I do understand that this is meant to be an exploration of deep psychological issues, but the way to represent that would be to make your choices meaningless (turning around doing the dream-like running thing), not to pretend you still have control.  And so I add another game to Tier Four – for reasons that were entirely preventable.

Neon Drive
by LepcisMagna

Even if it is pretty, Neon Drive is just a prettier version of BIT.TRIP Runner.  It has a few improvements – you get one free mistake and only rewind to the last checkpoint (of which there are more).  But in the end, it’s just another game requiring perfection and no human creativity.  Which is sad, because it has a fantastic aesthetic.

Steam link

Too Many Games
by LepcisMagna

I have too many games, and even trying all of them is turning out to be infeasible.  Therefore, I am putting everything with a “Mixed” review or lower on Steam into Tier Three, sight unseen.  Here is the list, in case I ever decide to come back to them to give them a fair shot:

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Illuminascii
by LepcisMagna

The promise of this game is pretty good: you are slowly waking up to a global conspiracy of some sort, in a 3D ASCII-inspired world.  Unfortunately – unless I’m missing something – waking up consists of finding floating purple things and right-clicking on them.  It’s…less than entertaining – just the same few pieces randomly placed again and again.  I wanted to like this, but there just isn’t anything there.  Tier Three.

Steam link

Girls Like Robots
by LepcisMagna

In Girls Like Robots, you must place girls, robots, nerds, cows, and more on a grid while keeping them happy on average.  Girls like robots (as you might expect) and dislike nerds.  Nerds dislike nerds, but like corners and girls.  Robots like girls but no more than three at a time.  Cows…have their own thing.

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Amnesia Memories: Pre-Post Review
by Chezni

Amnesia Memories

Chezni: I still need to finish Amnesia Memories dating sim anyway. If there isn’t a “grab my boyfriend by the back of the hair and ram his face into my knee ending” I’m going to be very upset
Chezni: Cuz I don’t know how I’m supposed to see anything redeeming in him
LepcisMagna: I was going to say
LepcisMagna: That seems like not the most usual ending to a dating sim
Chezni: I just feel like a tool around him
LepcisMagna: Don’t let him define you.
Chezni: aaaargh, I’m laughing so hard right now
LepcisMagna: No man is worth it

11/10, would play again

Pathos
by LepcisMagna

Nethack and Dwarf Fortress are known as some of the toughest games around – both for their unforgiving gameplay (the former being an expanded version of the actual Rogue…kinda), their remarkably complex rule sets, and for their occasionally impenetrable user interface.  Roguelikes probably deserve an entire article on their own on any self-respecting games review site…okay…new article idea.

Anyway – in an attempt to make Nethack more accessible (or at least have a user interface that clues you in a bit more to the rules underlying the game), Pathos was born.  Perhaps it loses a bit by showing you the statistics and cluing you in to what actions you can take – and I’m pretty sure the food randomization was tweaked.  My only real complaint is that it handles boundaries poorly – sometimes you won’t be able to see the other side of a room until you enter the tile right next to the edge of the screen.  But in the end, it’s the first version of Nethack I’ve been able to play on the go, on my iPad, without slowly losing the will to live.  Someday, I will ascend.

Link